Dan has had a rough few months. There's no way around it. Summers have just never been too great for him. We keep hoping for a summer with no surgeries!
May: Brand new baby! Exciting and exhausting.
June: Interviewed for new job by flying to NorCal and back in the same day. Began packing process and looking for a new house.
July: Spleen surgery. Pain, lethargy, pleural effusion, ER trip. Still packing and caring for brand new baby. Moved to Lodi.
August: Started new job. Belly swelling, still tired and hurting. Moved into new house with wife with bad back. Paracentesis #1.
September: Still teaching and coaching. Paracentesis #2. Still swollen and tired. Lots of doctor appointments. New meds. Nearly collapsing at football game from severe leg cramps.
Dan has endured this with very little complaining. He is dealing with health issues while working nearly non-stop and helping to raise a tiny human. He is constantly surrounded by papers to grade. He still smiles at his son. He still does dishes when he has the time. He still tries to make me feel loved (ie. letting me shower or run while he watches the baby).
Please join me in praying for Dan's healing. He needs some time of peace and comfort. He needs to be able to get healthy again so he can catch up on his work. He has a job that is very close to being perfect for him, but he's too tired to do it as well as he wants. He wants to feel good enough to play on the floor with Abe. Dan just needs to feel better.
As his wife, it is getting harder and harder to watch Dan be sick. I hate it. I try to trust God for His timing, but I'm getting frustrated and impatient. I'm not proud of it, but I feel like Dan's been forgotten.
Before someone jumps to remind me, I do know we have been immeasurably blessed. Baby, house, great job, insurance. Please do not assume that I am not grateful. I'm just sad.
Please pray for my tough cookie. He'll never complain to anyone else, but he feels bad. Pray for healing: complete and fast. Pray for endurance. Pray for God to change my heart if He isn't going to change the circumstances. Pray that I can support Dan as much as possible by taking care of the baby and our home. Pray for our marriage. Pray for peace and trust in the LORD. Just pray.
Loving each other while standing on the Rock!
Monday, September 16, 2013
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Be Still, My Soul
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.
Abraham likes to be sung to...sometimes. Most times, he just likes to wiggle and squirm and kick his legs and drool. Sometimes, though, he calms down when I sing to him. Aside from the stupid songs that I change the lyrics to as we play, this is the song that I sing the most. It seems easier to make my soul be still when a little human is cuddled close to my chest. His sweet, trusting breaths remind me that I too am being held close to Christ.
That being said, there is a lot going on nowadays that makes my mind race and my heart stumble.
Good things:
We are nearly settled into our new house. Abe is sleeping through the night occasionally (yay!). The cats have made their domain in the garage, though still like to cuddle. Dan is teaching and coaching football. I am busy being a housewife, though I am no June Cleever!
We are being spoiled being so close to family. My mother-in-law mopped my house and my father-in-law changed my flat tire! 'Thank you' will never be enough.
Dan's insurance has kicked in, and we are starting the process of getting hooked into Kaiser. I am realizing that we were insanely blessed to have insurance through my work, as we paid very little for our medical care and surgeries and testing. Our medical bills will be significantly higher now, but at least we have coverage!
Not so good things:
Dan is still suffering from complications from his spleen surgery in July. I thought the pain and lethargy right after was bad, but Dan is still having trouble. About a month after the surgery, his belly starting swelling. The doc said it was normal for a little bit. The swelling continued and then got worse. The last time I posted, Dan was getting his belly drained (paracentesis) for the first time. He felt a lot better...then his belly starting swelling again. A couple weeks ago, Dan woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me he was in a lot of pain and his belly was too big. So, his dad took him to the ER where he was fast tracked (his dad is a doctor at the hospital in town) through to another paracentesis. Each time, they have drained off almost 5 liters, and he feels better for a day or two. Each time, he starts to swell again.
Truthfully speaking: it sucks.
Dan is tired a lot and busy, so when he gets home, he has little energy to enjoy family time. This makes both of us sad. The summer was just so crazy, he hasn't had much time to recover or rest. The best thing would just be for his health to cooperate!
Anyway, Dan's first appointment with his Kaiser primary has led to a new medication and appointments with two more doctors within the week--a gastroenterologist and a new oncologist. Due to Dan's extensive and complicated history, the primary MD stated that Dan would be allowed to continue follow-up with his main doctor at Stanford (yay!). Of course, there will be a lot of paperwork, but this was encouraging news!
The doctors' main concern is that Dan's spleen is HUGE and the inflammation is still producing way more fluid and swelling (ascites) than what was expected. Since Dan's liver is swiss cheese (Dan's description) and his GI organs have taken a beating, the Kaiser primary thought it best to enlist the help of an MD who specializes in GI organs. Also, Dan's new oncologist is the chief of Oncology in Sacramento. We're hoping for encouraging news and a way to make Dan feel better.
This man deserves a break. I really hate seeing him hurting and tired.
Prayer requests:
* A solution for Dan's ascites
* No new cancer...EVER
* Settling into our new roles
* Health for our little man
* Financial security with medical bills and such
* Peace for our souls and hearts to trust God
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.
Abraham likes to be sung to...sometimes. Most times, he just likes to wiggle and squirm and kick his legs and drool. Sometimes, though, he calms down when I sing to him. Aside from the stupid songs that I change the lyrics to as we play, this is the song that I sing the most. It seems easier to make my soul be still when a little human is cuddled close to my chest. His sweet, trusting breaths remind me that I too am being held close to Christ.
That being said, there is a lot going on nowadays that makes my mind race and my heart stumble.
Good things:
We are nearly settled into our new house. Abe is sleeping through the night occasionally (yay!). The cats have made their domain in the garage, though still like to cuddle. Dan is teaching and coaching football. I am busy being a housewife, though I am no June Cleever!
We are being spoiled being so close to family. My mother-in-law mopped my house and my father-in-law changed my flat tire! 'Thank you' will never be enough.
Dan's insurance has kicked in, and we are starting the process of getting hooked into Kaiser. I am realizing that we were insanely blessed to have insurance through my work, as we paid very little for our medical care and surgeries and testing. Our medical bills will be significantly higher now, but at least we have coverage!
Not so good things:
Dan is still suffering from complications from his spleen surgery in July. I thought the pain and lethargy right after was bad, but Dan is still having trouble. About a month after the surgery, his belly starting swelling. The doc said it was normal for a little bit. The swelling continued and then got worse. The last time I posted, Dan was getting his belly drained (paracentesis) for the first time. He felt a lot better...then his belly starting swelling again. A couple weeks ago, Dan woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me he was in a lot of pain and his belly was too big. So, his dad took him to the ER where he was fast tracked (his dad is a doctor at the hospital in town) through to another paracentesis. Each time, they have drained off almost 5 liters, and he feels better for a day or two. Each time, he starts to swell again.
Truthfully speaking: it sucks.
Dan is tired a lot and busy, so when he gets home, he has little energy to enjoy family time. This makes both of us sad. The summer was just so crazy, he hasn't had much time to recover or rest. The best thing would just be for his health to cooperate!
Anyway, Dan's first appointment with his Kaiser primary has led to a new medication and appointments with two more doctors within the week--a gastroenterologist and a new oncologist. Due to Dan's extensive and complicated history, the primary MD stated that Dan would be allowed to continue follow-up with his main doctor at Stanford (yay!). Of course, there will be a lot of paperwork, but this was encouraging news!
The doctors' main concern is that Dan's spleen is HUGE and the inflammation is still producing way more fluid and swelling (ascites) than what was expected. Since Dan's liver is swiss cheese (Dan's description) and his GI organs have taken a beating, the Kaiser primary thought it best to enlist the help of an MD who specializes in GI organs. Also, Dan's new oncologist is the chief of Oncology in Sacramento. We're hoping for encouraging news and a way to make Dan feel better.
This man deserves a break. I really hate seeing him hurting and tired.
Prayer requests:
* A solution for Dan's ascites
* No new cancer...EVER
* Settling into our new roles
* Health for our little man
* Financial security with medical bills and such
* Peace for our souls and hearts to trust God
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